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Sunday, June 8, 2008

Why?!

There are certain things in this life that just make no sense whatsoever, I tried to compile a list of them, and this is what I came up with.

  • Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?

  • Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

  • Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars in the sky, but check when you say the paint is wet?

  • Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

  • Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

  • Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but duck when you throw a revolver at him?

  • Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

  • What evil SOB put an 's' in the word 'lisp'?

  • Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

  • Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? Or a furniture store that's not having a liquidation sale?

  • Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

  • Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

  • Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

  • How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

  • When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where the hell you're going?'

  • Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

  • In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

  • How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

2 comments:

Jennifer said...

What a great list. So obvious yet so funny.

Anonymous said...

A lot of these are explainable or not true....